Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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