Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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