I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
thus making me awesome and them whores
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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