i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
