Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Randomize
