would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i will never coherently bang her
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.