garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize