just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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