You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
