TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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