So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
