you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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