Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
