But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
