You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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