What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
im six kinds of drunk right now
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
