Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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