PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
