I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
