nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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