I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize