So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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