Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
i've created a new STD.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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