party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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