Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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