She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
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I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
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She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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