I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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