Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
