im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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