you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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