But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize