I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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