Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
we made out on top of his cat.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
