I cannot find my penis.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize