Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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