What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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