he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I think pants incapable of making pants work
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
