just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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