weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
