Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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