just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
