I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
Love having children with random chicks
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter