your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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