she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Do vagina's smell?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize