You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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