sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
