sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
