Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
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It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
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Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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