Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He called his prostate his "boner button".
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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