I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
